Dear Lucius: The Easter’s Special
I was sitting back with a belly full of the sickly sweet sugary blood that you can only get from children each Easter Sunday, and I just wondered exactly how you like to spend your Easter?
Nothing special, really.
I’m making everyone hop about like rabbits. And I don’t take no for an answer. Anyone dressed up in a giant Easter Bunny costume, finds me bursting into his house wielding a chainsaw. I’m making everybody eat every Easter egg they find. Until the last one of them. I’m hiding Easter eggs in the nastiest places: plumbing, toilets, cracks in the wood floor, walls, etc. On the other hand, I am NOT hiding Easter eggs in places that they don’t want to be hidden. I’m piercing holes in everyone’s chocolate rabbits, and blame the Easter Hunter. I’m delivering gaily wrapped baskets of decapitated heads painted in garishly painted colours. I’m holding hostage of the eggs.
Oh, and Rabbit is on the menu at the Palazzo. Care to join? I’ll have baskets of goodies to pass out.
I hope this helps,
~Lucius Solves all your problems instantly - or your money back!