The Facts About Lucius, an Exclusive and no ASSumptions

2 minute read

As the entire city now knows, the infamous and ancient Lucius did silently, in the night, become the childer of ancient and evil Roadie, aka road_wytch. It is indeed old news by now, personal to those involved, and I feel no need to pry into the private affairs of one that has taken a public vow of silence.

Though in light of thorough and accurate reporting, this paper did its due diligence and asked Lucius’ now enormous extended family if they were willing to share with us what brought on this sudden turn of events. Not much response came about, beyond mad giggling, cackling, and some bizarre mention of a strap-on initiation, all of which made no sense to this reporter.

No one may ever know why Lucius chose to take a Sire at this late time in his unlife. Maybe it was the one thing he had yet to do in his long and eventful time in this city. I certainly do not wish to speculate and report on anything I don’t know as fact, and I certainly have no intention of allowing Donkeys or Asses to report the news for this paper either. Be that as it may, it is highly doubtful that the truth shall ever be revealed, considering Lucius and his beautiful wife have avowed a public silence and the evil and stoic vampire Roadie isn’t exactly one known to be forthcoming with information.

This reporter does wonder one thing, however. Why do so many in the city obsess about Lucius’ doings? If he is so insignificant, akin to those that herald “the sky is falling” regularly by some, why is it, even in his silence, his actions are to them…always headline news?

Instead of prying into this silent celebrity’s life, like paparazzi in need of a fix, I take this editorial moment to offer my congratulations to Lucius and his new, rather large and illustrious family. May it bode them all well.

In a final salute to Lucius and his new family, I give you an exclusive, here in print. For the first and last time… his very last words before leaving the public halls for good.

He has zipped his mouth He has zipped his heart No more cry, no more laugh He has mastered a new art A mere sigh before you die The dead silent guy.

Comments


Poo

Who on EARTH would allow a donkey to report the news. HAHAHAHA! shifty eyes

Jauk Lokason Ladywulfe’s Blood Sister –> Yggdrasil <–


Aahzmandius

I am content. }:)

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